Marriage. Having family.

Marriage. People say, it’s a next step in one’s life. After you ride on a journey with yourself for years, now you share that journey with your partner in a legal way. Declared. Registered. Celebrated.

Two of my colleagues recently got married. And both of them (with their own spouses) seemed very happy. Glowy face (uhm), laughter, and stories (sometimes the story became too intimate and I had to tell them to stop it).

Me? I never thought the idea of marriage seriously. My imagination went only as far as it went: the party. How will I design the party? Hm.. Having a party in the beach, wearing lightweight flowy white dress, bare feet, and barely no make up. It will be a private party inviting only closest friends and families. and the guests will all wear beach attires, a bunch of people having cozy conversations while enjoying the sea breeze. After that, I went blank.

‘Normally’, people will aim for procreation. However I dread to think of having kids. I consider myself as too selfish to raise a little human being who will demand most of my time and energy, physically and emotionally. I used to think that marriage was a waste of time, but now I think, although for me, it sounds dreadful, there are some of my friends who see it as their aspiration. The idea of being together and raising family with their spouses make them happy. Some of them say, it is a commitment for love, for happiness, and for sadness to be happiness.

Yesterday as I silently observed moms talking about how hard it is to raise a kid, to make sure that they eat well, study hard, etc. It not only consumes mom’s time, but their personal space as well, out of love. But, despite of it, they seemed very happy when they talked about it. Dealing with their tantrum, feeding, teaching, worrying,  etc. are just some of the lists. Then, maybe, when one has kid and raises kid, that person will learn the true unselfish love.

For my friends who just got married or are about to be, congratulation. Hope you can really understand, master, and live the unselfish love. And don’t forget to cc me in your e-mail to universe, so I can also learn a little about that side of life: how to love unselfishly.


P.S.: I still find this song cheesy and overpromise. Maybe you can help me unlock the reason why this song is said to be one of the greatest songs of all time?

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